Our beloved cat Sweetie passed away today. Sweetie was the first pet I owned as an adult, the first (and only) pet that was "all mine" (rather than a pet my parents owned when I was a child).
It was exactly four weeks ago today that I noticed she was not acting right and realized she had stopped eating. At that time she was diagnosed with feline hypertrophic caridiomyopathy and was in acute congestive heart failure. The last month was spent providing her lots of medical care, helping hand feed her, researching the medical condition, figuring out what we could do to save her, and also getting over the shock that she was unwell and that she was in the process of dying.
Despite being glad that her suffering is over I am very sad and feeling the loss and as I write this I am getting upset all over again. My children are also upset, mostly my younger son, who was closer to her. So not only am I upset but we are dealing with the subject of death and grieving with our young children. Yet again I am experiencing the reminder that as a parent it is not just all about me, I have to rise up and handle the parenting of my children through this as well. (In my opinion this is how parenting our children forces us to not be selfish and it forces us to learn to put the needs of others above our own needs, and to do what we are responsible to do not just what we want to do or what we 'feel like' doing. We also learn to not procrastinate and avoid doing something that is unpleasant, sometimes we have just just 'do it' and 'deal with it'.)
My husband and children dug her grave this afternoon and we buried her promptly.
I have a homeschool support group meeting to lead tonight at my home. Life goes on. I should go sweep the floor and tidy up the living room now, I guess. I am torn between cancelling the meeting to be alone with my family to continue shedding tears or to welcome friendly homeschool moms into my home for fellowship, support, and laughter. I think it will be better for everyone concerned to go on with the meeting. Hopefully my spirits will be lifted and they will also get something positive from attending the meeting, so it will be a win/win situation all around.
Now you know why I've not taken the time to blog much about making art in this last month. I hope to get back to blogging on this blog and sharing scans of my ATCs with you soon.
I don't feel like writing much right now. So I will just stop now.
2 comments:
I am so very sorry for your loss. Reading this, I shared tears along with you.
My condolences on the loss of your cat. We lost our 18yo cat in October and I just moped and wallowed all weekend. It will get better over time. Let yourself feel sad. Ignore any comments about "just a cat."
I did some art in my journal about her. I made a collage of her medication labels and her shots record . I sketched a bunch of items that wouldn't fit in my book. Water bowl, napping spot, cat toys.
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